the house of miss birdie

SO... Yes it's been awhile. Living life and stuff. The thing is, in my absence here, I've sincerely been taking care of business for myself and Bam. Now, it's time for me to share what I've learned with you. I wrote a few books, crossed over a few genres but still stayed within self help. Now more for adults. I realized that to help the children that my earlier books highlight, I also have to help the people entrusted with their care. You can't pour from an empty cup. We all do it. Give energy and resources that we honestly don't have. After doing that (and burning out several times) I've come up with a new philosophy for myself. "You'll get there Birdie, one moment, one day at a time." Simple, right? How? That's the other piece of the philosophy, it's by "Shifting Up." To shift by definition, is a slight change in emphasis, direction or focus. By shifting up, you make small changes towards a better life. That's wh

After reading article after article, hearing complaint after complaint. I'm tired of hearing people complain about Tyler Perry. In the seat of public opinion, everyone is allowed to have their opinion. #1 Complaint: Because of using Madea. He's described as a "Clown" "Buffoon" "Drag". "Tyler Perry has gotten rich off of exploiting Black Women." -  is the most popular. Yes, he has built his career with Madea, a pistol packing, abrasive no-nonsense woman with stereotypical toxic behaviors but still relatable grandmother figure. A long ignored truth  is that black women aren't feeling protected in our communities. It is no secret that black women are silenced, with our health, our children, our men, out in the workforce. We get called bitches for having power in our voices, people tremble and call us toxic when we stand up for ourselves. We want to be there for our men but the truth is, a lot of black men don't know how to lov

Ok. Being that I myself live with depression,  I have been very defensive about explaining what has been happening lately with the untimely deaths of some people around us. It's hard to accept but these loved individuals were afflicted with a chronic condition that they have now chosen to take the path of least resistance in their lives by ending it. Don't kill the messenger, it's the most simplistic way to explain it. In other words, all they want is the pain to end. Their reasoning and justifications are not for us to understand. Don't take it personal, it's not you. It's the easier way out, literally. Now I'm seeing well intentioned posts that wonderful people are offering a shoulder to cry on. We love you very much but... 1. Depressed people don't want to stay there. It is a painful place to be. So unless you're a professional, talking about it with you is not the way to help us long term. Sometimes we're in a dark place and we don't

I wrote this piece in July 2015 and now it has been 4 years since Sandra Bland's Murder. We can never forget how her death emphasized and magnified the disrespect for a black woman's life and how easily someone's ego can rip a life from this earthly existence. There has been countless and senseless murders in the name of "Blue Justice", I can't help but think of the ways her murder was covered up and silenced. This is re-published in hopes that we #neverforget #sayhername  July 2015 - Without even immersing yourself in Social media, CNN, FOX or any news outlets you are still witnessing a devastating abuse of power in the case of Sandra Bland. Sandra Bland is me, my sister, our girlfriends, mother's, aunt's and cousins. And all Sandra Bland did was not properly signal, get stopped for it and "sass" Officer at the time, Brian Encinia. That's it. Personally, anyone I know, with the weight of their life and their day, the rush

So, I've been busy. So many things have happened since the last time I've shared with you. Nowadays, I'm doing motivational speaking, writing adult books and expanding my brand exponentially and I'm so excited. SO EXCITED!!!! Saggy Boobs is a memoir about my journey until now and I can't wait to share it with you. I named my book after a moment in time that I really didn't feel good about myself. I was tired, broke and sad. I was at a party and was so uncomfortable already with the crazy events at the party. It was ugly, me and 2 other exes were at the party. I tried to play it cool, but I got a hot flash. I rushed into a room, and while taking off my sweater, my shirt caught onto my sweater and for a millisecond, my stomach was exposed. I quickly put it down but when I turned my head, my son's father was standing in the doorway and had caught it. He had this look on his face that unnerved me. We were in a bad place at this point with a custody battle

Last night, I cried proud tears when Frances McDormand stood up with pride amongst women in Hollywood and told the seated men to think of and include these women when they negotiate their contracts. I was so happy. I knew that she included me. Then I saw black women on twitter say, “Well how does Inclusion Riders help other black women?” I felt a punch in the gut.  We saw firsthand what inclusion rider was when Jessica Chastain did it for Octavia Spencer. They were negotiating with the studio to make their own movie. Because Jessica stood with Octavia, Octavia got 5 times more than she would have gotten. That was with Jessica just to just have equal pay. Yes, Equal Pay. On one hand, I see what the women on Twitter meant, because in our experience, it has been proven that black women shattering the glass ceiling is even harder than it is for a white woman, let alone any man of any color.  It’s been our experience that the world still doesn’t know a women’s worth. Unspoken (or spoken)