So, I've know that I've been M.I.A. (Missing In Action) lately.
Most of 2012 to be exact. When the year started and the ball dropped, I knew everything was different, I felt fresher, creative and optimistic about everything. From finishing books and illustrations to expanding my book writing business to include adult and YA fiction. Editing opportunities multiplied Then, at the very beginning of the year, the sledgehammer dropped. My son got very sick and nothing else mattered but him.
Although there was nothing I could have done, I was guilty of being so busy and self-involved that I had been neglecting my son's needs. But I now I know that was not true and there was nothing I could have done differently to prevent any of it. But EVERYTHING (not Bam-related) was getting dropped. I picked up the tiniest of editing jobs, just to keep some income, but nothing overly time consuming. Money was starting to be a huge problem for the first time in years. Then the custody battle happened. I grew so angry and felt betrayed. I've always strived for balance in my life and now everything was "out of wack" and all over the place. Nothing on this earth is more important than my son. But now everything was falling apart. People I considered friends started dropping like flies.
Then we moved. A huge move. Great adjustment, new environment, best thing for my son and I so far. Then he got a clean bill of health. It was a short battle but I won custody. All of my prayers answered. And I got plenty of new beginnings. Good stuff. Picking up the pieces wasn't easy but it all fit together in the right way.
Now that the end of another year is approaching, so many good things are on the horizon for me. Setting myself up with opportunities I never knew existed. My brand is growing and now I'm working on myself so much more. Me time. I never imagined that! Although at the time I thought life was over and sunk deep into hopelessness, I learned that everything happened for a reason. And although it was hard and most of you got the negative stuff all year and I really needed you, I understand the timeout some of you put me on. Everything is never as ideal as we would like it to be and some weren't used to me being as dark as I was. Granted. Point taken.
Most of 2012 to be exact. When the year started and the ball dropped, I knew everything was different, I felt fresher, creative and optimistic about everything. From finishing books and illustrations to expanding my book writing business to include adult and YA fiction. Editing opportunities multiplied Then, at the very beginning of the year, the sledgehammer dropped. My son got very sick and nothing else mattered but him.
Although there was nothing I could have done, I was guilty of being so busy and self-involved that I had been neglecting my son's needs. But I now I know that was not true and there was nothing I could have done differently to prevent any of it. But EVERYTHING (not Bam-related) was getting dropped. I picked up the tiniest of editing jobs, just to keep some income, but nothing overly time consuming. Money was starting to be a huge problem for the first time in years. Then the custody battle happened. I grew so angry and felt betrayed. I've always strived for balance in my life and now everything was "out of wack" and all over the place. Nothing on this earth is more important than my son. But now everything was falling apart. People I considered friends started dropping like flies.
Then we moved. A huge move. Great adjustment, new environment, best thing for my son and I so far. Then he got a clean bill of health. It was a short battle but I won custody. All of my prayers answered. And I got plenty of new beginnings. Good stuff. Picking up the pieces wasn't easy but it all fit together in the right way.
Now that the end of another year is approaching, so many good things are on the horizon for me. Setting myself up with opportunities I never knew existed. My brand is growing and now I'm working on myself so much more. Me time. I never imagined that! Although at the time I thought life was over and sunk deep into hopelessness, I learned that everything happened for a reason. And although it was hard and most of you got the negative stuff all year and I really needed you, I understand the timeout some of you put me on. Everything is never as ideal as we would like it to be and some weren't used to me being as dark as I was. Granted. Point taken.
I wouldn't have been able to make it without God and the great people in my life that truly love me and stuck by me close and far: good, bad and ugly. Although everything is still coming together and nothing is perfect, my life has a new perspective. I also know that I'm in a better position to be that same (but better) lighter and brighter Birdie.
You'll see. Stay tuned.